Thee red dragons

WHY is it that life never seems to go right for me? Its always a battle, E am never content, E am often bored, surely it wasn’t meant to be like this. E wish E didn’t know thee things E know or believe thee things E believe, it must be said ignorance is bliss, if you don’t know you don’t care, E wish E didn’t care….but E do! People always seem to be putting me down or trying to take something from me, E guess that makes me valid but E don’t know if E enjoy life…E enjoy bits ov it, but E still remain suicidal in some respects, it will only take one major thing to push me into slashing my wrists again, one major thing Jesus that’s not a lot is it? E wish E understood these doors E keep opening, thee more E open, thee more confused my perception ov life, thee universe and something. It is suggested god wanted to make a perfect race when he put Adam and Eve here, Hitler wanted to make a perfect race too, an Anti-Christ without any doubt, thee second…where is thee third? E believe he or she is here now, they’ve got to be, life gets worse for most people everyday, there’s wars and violence and just yesterday thee desecration ov Jewish graves, shit its happening now! E don’t know if E can handle this one, with that threat over my head, what’s thee point in security because there is none, it does not exist with these concepts in thee world. So what to do? Keep seeing bands, buying records and taking LSD and ignoring it, is that thee way? Why do thee people around me piss me off so much? Why does Thee Scene act thee way he does? Some days E could kill him on others he’s thee only friend E have got, why does he do it? It will only end in tears and violence, it always does, its thee way ov mankind! E wish E could create something, E write sure but that’s it, scraps ov paper in a folder, enough evidence to lock me away for years? E should put all these thoughts into a book really but would anyone want to publish it? E guess not! Still if it were a book E know that E would buy it “Jesus thee works ov a schizophrenic acidhead lonely romantic on a bummer far-out taxi ride to thee oblivion ov thee world as we know it”, now there’s a title. E look around and what do E see? A million problems screaming at me, with no solutions and no escape, E now know why E generate hate, a lack ov direction, no confidence, a lifetime sitting beneath thee fence, a flash ov frustration to make me cry, E can’t say that E would be scared to die, a no-way out sign in my vision, a no-entry to my religion, a heavy dub soundtrack to all my life, why did John Lennon get shot and die? Why don’t E have many friends no more? There were lots at one time, lots ov people close to me now there’s just Thee Scene and maybe Thee Buzz if he would let me, where’s Thee Maniac Kram when E need him? Pissed probably. Is it because E have taken so many steps forward that people just don’t know me anymore? Or is it that no one likes me anymore? Just like thee dread LSD E feel revolutionary and outcast, E have no family to speak ov, apart from my sister but she’s not having a normal life anyway, surely E didn’t deserve this, E didn’t choose to be born that way and E didn’t disown anybody, they disowned me, its hard trying to be happy when no-one tells you they love you or explains why they don’t care. (14/05/90)

But ov course E learned, to let go ov thee lies they had filled my head with, that circles ov friends change and dissipate, that giving up is never an answer but a challenge, that E could find my own family by sharing thoughts with thee people E met, to like myself and from there believe in myself, that life has its ups and downs but if you truly believe will reward you in thee strangest and most unexpected ways, to not count on God or pseudo enlightenment, or government or reason, but to have sheer unadulterated faith in thee fact that E am right on thee button thee whole fucking time, E know thee truth as it is for me, and you know thee truth as it is for you, and when thee lies mount up, thee truth will out. (2006)

Thy will be done

E long for a day where there’s chaos, and thee streets are paved with blood, and thee corrupt have now been thwarted, and thee final battle’s won, E long for a day to end all days, to see thee carnage in thee sun, E long for a day when establishment’s raised, to thee ground, thy will be done, E long for a day when thee blind, ignoramus who run this land, have pushed us to thee limits, and we chopped off their foul hands, E long for a day when there’s judgement, and we all can live as one, E long for thee day, pure and honestly, my lord, thy will be done, E long for thee truth and thee justice, and E long for thee promised land, and E long for thee rich and thee poorer, to respect their fellow man, and E long for thee black and thee white, to join and be as one, and to vanquish all thee oppression, my lord, thy will be done, E long for thee day to end all days, to see thee carnage in thee sun, E long for a day when establishment’s raised, to thee ground then E will be done. (1989)

Is this real? Is this what E feel? Into thee dragon’s breath, into thee dragon’s breath, Into thee dragon’s breath, Into thee dragon’s breath, magic mushrooms are thee skin ov God said a madman on TV, they must be here for a reason and that’s what is puzzling me, so E question and E question and E question authority, we must be here for a reason and it’s very plain to see, Into thee dragon’s breath, into thee dragon’s breath, Into thee dragon’s breath, Into thee dragon’s breath, in thee pool ov liquid sky E swam, E opened wide thee doors, E discovered new continents because E lost sight ov thee shore, E drift in a cloud from thee sky factory, and E think for myself and E smile and E dream, we must be here for a reason and that reason comes through me, Into thee dragon’s breath, into thee dragon’s breath, Into thee dragon’s breath, Into thee dragon’s breath, E can see in your eyes rebel and arise, awaken in time, take control ov your life, we are all minds, all kind ov beings are we, and it’s written in thee nature ov things to be free, we must be here for a reason, we must be here for a reason, we must be here for a reason and thee reason to be free, Into thee dragon’s breath, into thee dragon’s breath, Into thee dragon’s breath, Into thee dragon’s breath, is this real? Is this what E feel? (Lost timezone)

Family

Family, we have a family, conscience reigns as nightmares fall, growing pains within these walls, life has changed so drastically, E didn’t know but now E see, life is all we have it’s true, children grow from love in you, this world must be changed for them, healed and re-arranged again, family, we have a family, all can be like me and you, truest love and eyes ov blue, deep in day and wild at night, all is seen by newborn eyes, we will be eternally, grateful for this liberty, give us reason to go on, to give our children life in songs, family, we have a family, we have a family ov love. (09/04/96)